Divorce Recovery for Men: Why The New York Times Took Notice
Updated: 3 days ago
You would not expect to play your best without preparation. Divorce asks you to make some of the biggest decisions of your life while you are exhausted, angry or barely holding it together. My job is to help you prepare, think ahead and follow through. That is the work The New York Times featured when it covered divorce coaching in May 2025. If you're looking for a divorce coach for men, start here to see how MeDiCo combines divorce strategy with recovery coaching.
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When Brianna Holt from New York Times asked to feature me in one of her articles she had a question. On your website you say "Immediate Results", what do you mean by immediate results? My response was as honest as it can get but knowing full well it can get me in trouble if I couldn't back it up but fortunately I could. "When I talk about 'immediate results,' I mean by the end of our first talk. I say this knowing full well how it sounds and I’m not claiming to fix everything in one call but often (in the recovery), the fun part begins. My strategy is to get them in front of their problems and rather than catch up to their problems, I try to get them to leap forward to their present and something inside shifts. Most men walk into that first conversation carrying shame, confusion and a lifetime of fear. They’re exhausted and talking about their problems is difficult enough because they’re not used to it. They feel defeated but they’re not, they just need to regain perspective. By the time we’re done, they feel something they haven’t felt in a while: Hope and empowered.
Imagine going through a divorce alone. Now imagine going through one with someone that's been through 100s of them, consults, and provides you with answers and thinks 3 steps ahead. That's what I do, I coach divorcing men and it's not unlike a pitching coach working with a professional pitcher on his technique and guiding them. I just do it with divorcing men.
The New York Times feature brought attention to support many men still do not know exists. A divorce coach helps you prepare for decisions and put a plan into action. Recovery coaching helps you rebuild the confidence, routines and life that the breakup disrupted. My work brings those together.
Men going through divorce need room to speak honestly about the disruption, and they also need a way forward. In my coaching, we give the problem enough attention to understand it, then work on decisions, priorities and concrete action. If the conversation becomes a loop, I will respectfully bring us back to what you can do next.
That's why I became a coach. Rather than having you to talk about the problem and leaving you walking away frustrated after 45 minutes I come with answers and I don't set a stop watch during my sessions. I offer ideas, their pros and their cons, potential pitfalls, plans A, B, or C. Even strategies to get so far ahead of the game that you actually walk out excited about your future, while forgetting about your past.
My goal isn’t for you to survive this chapter of your life. My goal is for you to close that book and write a new one. One so compelling that you won’t even bother opening the last chapter you were on.
What is the difference between a divorce coach, divorce lawyer and therapist?
A divorce coach helps you prepare for decisions, make a practical plan and follow through. A divorce lawyer provides legal advice and representation. A licensed mental-health professional provides therapy. My work combines divorce strategy and recovery coaching, and can complement the support you receive from an attorney or therapist.
The crazy part? You’ll have fun doing it.
My coaching is direct and tailored to your life. We work through options, weigh trade-offs and turn your priorities into specific next steps. You should leave a working session with clearer direction and actions you can carry out. I do not promise that one conversation will resolve your grief; I help you build a plan and follow through.
At MensDivorceCoaching.com, we:
✅ Guide you through the divorce process, from strategy to finding an appropriate attorney.
News flash, they're like spicy food, may taste great at first but after you've digested it, you'll regret it.
✅ Maximize shared custody and improving father/child relationship (Focus on your needs).
✅ Rebuild Your Identity as a Newly Single Man (Purpose as a newly single man).
✅ End the Isolation that Crushes Men After Divorce (Loneliness Factor).
If you’re wondering if this is right for you, read the full NYT article or continue reading below: Read Article. Then book a free consult because this is your life, your process and we’re here to help you take the next step forward form A to Z.
Why the New York Times Feature Matters
In divorce, women recover better than men. It's believed that they go through a process of self realization and are faster to adapt to single life. Men on the other hand, stay left behind. In a word, we stonewall. While women search for guidance through different social circles, men are left alone. The New York Times recognizes that men are in need of guidance, that we feel just as much if not more than our ex. After all, 70% of women want the divorce. The New York Times dug into the real story behind divorce coaching for men, why it’s growing, why it’s necessary, and how it’s changing lives.
Divorce coaching and therapy have different roles. My coaching focuses on practical planning, preparation and accountability during divorce and recovery. Therapy is provided by a qualified mental-health professional and can also include practical skills and action. Coaching does not replace therapy or legal advice; these forms of support can complement each other.
Key Points from the New York Times Article
If you missed the article, here’s what you need to know:
✅ Divorce is more than a legal battle. It’s a personal war that affects your mind, body, self esteem.
✅ Men often spiral in silence. They lose themselves, their edge, and don’t have a clear path forward.
✅ Divorce coaching supports practical decisions and follow-through. I’m here to help you organize priorities, prepare and act with a clear plan.
✅ In my coaching program, you get:
A Quality of Life Assessment to map out your current state
A fitness and mental health baseline — because you can’t rebuild without your body in check
A strengths-based growth plan using the Gallup StrengthsFinder to work with your natural talents, not against them
Personal guidance on style, dating, and social confidence. Because you’re not just surviving divorce, you’re stepping back into the world
24/7 access for urgent strategy sessions
Support navigating high-conflict issues like custody battles, restraining orders, and legal strategy
I track how clients describe their quality of life through coaching. In a separate client follow-up, average scores rose from 59 at entry to 83 after three to six months, a 24-point increase. My larger QoL-SALAD survey explores how men’s reported quality of life differs across identity, dating, fatherhood and other parts of life after separation. These are different groups, not a controlled comparison. The results are self-reported, and individual outcomes vary.
Common comments from my clients are "You did the impossible, I'm actually excited about my life" or "Not sure why I feel better so quickly, but I do" "Everything you said was going to happen, happened". There's a reason for that. While human behavior is unpredictable, patterns lead to predictable results and that's what I do. I search for patters; study the ex, study children, judges, attorneys, married and newly single men and their outcome. You're lonely, I get it. But being in a room full of people won't help the loneliness. You need to fill that empty void and that happens when you have guidance, direction, and a plan for where you need to go next.
That’s what I give you.
That’s what I do.
Get off that funk and stop surviving. Life isn't about waiting for the pain to end. It's not about giving it time. It's about building and creating. It's time you begin to thrive, here’s your next step:
👉 Read the full New York Times article here
👉 Watch my latest YouTube video here
👉 Schedule Your Time To Speak (extended hours) coaching here
👉 Join our Facebook Group click here
Look through this site. Read other articles in the "Blog" section, check out my YouTube Channel, reach out with any questions. No selling here, just honest, direct feedback.
As your coach here's what I recommend. Schedule a free and confidential consultation (I extended my hours and it's not a sales pitch, I promise). Once done join our private Facebook group. Watch YouTube videos, and when we speak (through Zoom), be yourself. I'll take care of the rest.
If you feel defeated or unsure where to start, bring that to our first conversation. We can identify a useful next step and discuss whether coaching fits your needs. You do not have to solve everything before asking for support.
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